With change, usually comes emotions. My girl emotions are very typical, on days they are a roller coaster and on others you'd need a case of dynamite exploding to get much of a reaction out of me. One moment the screaming children running through a destroyed house won't phase me, then the next moment I might start giggling at something one of the kids say and before you know it, my laughing has turned into crying. And if the Mr. would be observing this he most likely would be standing speechless not sure what to do, oh dear!
Today started a brand new chapter of returning to work full-time and the biggest change ... I was not returning to the classroom to teach math. While so many worries and thoughts could and should have been filling my head, my spirit has been very peaceful, eerily peaceful. The peaceful where you know for a fact you could be understandably freaking out but you're not. The peaceful where there are SO many things you could be filling your mind with and fretting over but you're not. The peaceful where you should be overwhelmed with an abundance of new information but you're not. It's in times of this kind of peace I know it's only by the Grace of God my emotions are so calm AND I am right where God wants me to be!
My emotions aren't always in check but I also know the only reason why they are right now is because I fully handed over a situation, one that started more than 4 years ago, to God and it wasn't until this last 6 months when I started praying like this ...
"God you know me best. You know me better than I know myself. You know what will work for me and what will not. If it's not for me close the door and if it is, lead me to where I need to be and take any unnecessary emotions away."
I found it very fitting as one of the praise and worship songs this past Sunday, was a favorite old hymn of mine,
It is Well with My Soul.
- When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,When sorrows like sea billows roll;Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say,It is well, it is well with my soul.
- Refrain:It is well with my soul,It is well, it is well with my soul.
- Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,Let this blest assurance control,That Christ hath regarded my helpless estate,And hath shed His own blood for my soul.
- My sin—oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!—My sin, not in part but the whole,Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!
- For me, be it Christ, be it Christ hence to live:If Jordan above me shall roll,No pang shall be mine, for in death as in lifeThou wilt whisper Thy peace to my soul.
- But, Lord, ’tis for Thee, for Thy coming we wait,The sky, not the grave, is our goal;Oh, trump of the angel! Oh, voice of the Lord!Blessed hope, blessed rest of my soul!
- And Lord, haste the day when the faith shall be sight,The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,Even so, it is well with my soul.
This song was written by Horatio Spafford and has a very touching story behind it. No matter the changes that life brings, when God's on our side and we have faith in Him our soul can be at peace!